I’ve been really bored
Sunday, April 15, 2012 by eloramariel

So I’ve been looking for another part time job that is flexible with (hopefully) school and well, no hit. Ah well, I’m still going to be spamming all those potential ones I see. I guess it’s not that bad. If you think of it in a positive way, I get more choices.

However, since I don’t really want to waste money by going out and not really doing much, so I’ve been staying home and well, enjoying life. Let’s just go with that. It’s really hard to enjoy life though, I realized. It’s not as … satisfying as it should be, yet it’s really awesome. So, I don’t know how to explain bumming around well.

I went for a job interview at East Coast Road and I thought, hey, I’d look pretty for it. Up my first impression a little bit. I don’t know whether they’ll hire me because it seems unlikely. Hopefully they would because it seems pretty cool and convenient too. I love buses.

Anyway, I liked the way I drew my eyeliner, and well, my face get-up. When I got home, I didn’t really want to waste it. So I decided cam-whoring. Ah, hasn’t it been somewhat of an a while. If you get what I mean. no-kinky. 

When I usually choke my pictures folder, I like to make funny faces at my camera. Or in a better and easier way to say it, whenever I rape the camera button, I like to make funny faces instead of trying to get pretty ones. Kid’s got to entertain herself, right? So I did.

I did a series in which I tried to show the action of smiling from a weird ass look. This might make my so called ‘reputation’ go down if ever found (which is likely in the future, when someone wants to blackmail me or something) but it’s real funny and I’d like to remember this if I ever get an amnesia or whatnot. 

I’m so cute ~ hehehehe … and weird. and freaky. ;)

ps/ I swore it seemed cute when I was taking the picture. hmmm. funny judgement.

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Procrastinator Me
Thursday, April 12, 2012 by eloramariel

The problem with me is that I procrastinate a lot and I can’t control myself sometimes. Which is really sad, for my age at least. I’m turning bloody 21 soon and I realized, hey, you achieved nothing much really. The plans I had the year before, all of them just went down the drain.

I saw a page from my notebook before about how I plan to go to South Korea and live there for a week or so. All I need is $4K. Holy shit, I can’t even keep $50 in my bank, let alone $4k. I think I’m doomed for the future really.

However, I’m really really blessed to have the people that I care for around me. Though I don’t talk to majority of them daily but I guess, even with that, it doesn’t feel like we’re really just going to stop talking to each other for real. Well, hopefully not.

I really need to stop procrastinating or at least lessen it from 140% to 100%. (Yes, it’s a 9gag percentage thing) So at least it’s 40% lesser procrastination in my life, does that even make sense? I need to buck up. I need to wake up. I need to man up.

I honestly don’t know how many times I’ve said this. I predict, a few months from now, that I’ll be blogging the exact same thing. Ridiculous really. I went to the temple with my best friend (just for extra luck) and I did that thing where you shake the holder and a stick will come out and it kind of tells you if what you asked has a good or bad outcome? Yeah, I don’t really know what it’s called. I got a good outcome, so hopefully it is true.

I know I know, I’m a catholic. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have the free will to just check out other religions right? Okay, maybe I don’t. I’m not exactly strict with my religion. I don’t dis other people’s religion either. It’s to each his own, isn’t it? I’m pretty open-minded to these kind of things. Just hope that it won’t really bite me back in the ass when I’m at the pearly white gates.

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I promise I’ll try to update more often. For myself, though. :)
Monday, April 9, 2012 by eloramariel
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I hate it when I fall for someone so fast
Tuesday, March 6, 2012 by eloramariel

I guess that’s one of the many bad habits I have. Yes, I do crush easily but usually that’s easier to move on than someone that really intrigues me. It’s not exactly that hard to intrigue me but it’s not exactly that easy either.

And just recently, someone did intrigued me. No, nothing to really congratulate about or what not. 

See, for the weekend, I hung out with this person and although we have quite vocalized differences, he still intrigued me. Maybe it’s because I’m weird like that. I wanted to get to know more about him but yet I’m too shy to ask or more of, I’m a bit afraid to tread on any topic because he has his bipolar moods. By right, that should already put me off. It didn’t. Weird.

I guess if I were to be completely honest. I liked the fact that he was pretty straightforward with the things he said. His opinions. You know how I like guys with opinions of their own that they vocalize so boldly. His seriousness. The way he jokes around. Even his mood swings. It’s probably because of the fact that when he’s so serious, he looks scary or gives that aura, that makes me feel like I should listen if I were to be told to stop smoking or doing something. Yet, because of my stubbornness and unwilling to give in, I wouldn’t really listen. I know, I contradict myself.

But like what my best friend said to me, I deserve better. I deserve that someone that will accept me for who I am and find me perfect as it is.

The only part I hate is the moving on phase from liking someone that’s (sadly) always in your mind for the meantime.

I still like you and will like you for a while …

… ah well, time to move on. :)

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